This is something I wrote a couple weeks ago-on June 7th, which is what would have been mine and Adam's 5 year anniversary.

Dear Adam,
Today would be our 5 year wedding anniversary. I think back to that day, 5 years ago and what it meant for us. It was a hot, sunny day. We were young and naive, and happy above all else. We were surrounded by the people we loved and we made vows to each other that we both held sacred.
Now it's 5 years later and you haven't been here for almost 3 years. I have lived nearly 3 whole years without you in my life. It's been a very hard 3 years Adam, but I have lived through them and I have come through all the things that life has thrown at me, a better, stronger person. I know you would be proud of the woman that I am Adam. You would be proud to call me your wife. I have done my best to honor your name that I carry, by being true to myself and listening to my heart and soul.
Now that you're gone and I have learned to be alone again, I have found someone. Planning a new wedding while wanting to celebrate your anniversary is something I never thought I'd have to do, but I can say that about a lot of things in my life. This wedding is not about you and I, but I want you to know that the void in my soul that your absence has created cannot and will not be filled by any other person. I am lucky to not feel lonely and scared anymore. Those are voids that have been filled, but no one will ever be you. I am lucky to love Rick the same way that I loved you, but at the same time, differently. God has blessed me to have found love again, and to be happy again, when I thought I might never feel this way. I just want you to know, Adam, that today was OUR day. It will always be our day. As much as I can't wait to start my life with Rick, I am aware that there would be no Rick in my life if it wasn't for you. So thank you for everything Adam. I miss you every day, but it's not as hard as it used to be, and I know that you're happy that I'm so happy. How can one person love two people? I don't know, but it's possible. Thank you for loving me and for letting me love you. Taking care of a person that sick creates a bond that is unlike any other. I hope I never have to face that with Rick, but if I do, I will be prepared to do it because I learned how to with you. I dream of you now and again Adam, but I do not worry for you, because I know you are safe, and not in pain, and that is all I could ever ask for you.
Thank you for the lessons that your death has taught me. I am the best person I can be because of it. Even though I would have never asked you to make that sacrifice, I am grateful every day because of what I know and who I am now.
So again, thank you. And happy anniversary. I miss you.
Lauren

March? Really? Where has the time gone? Being that it's March 6th, that means my finals start a week from today and a week after that I will blissfully be on Spring Break with another semester under my belt!! I can't wait for finals to be over! I was hoping to get to Utah for Spring Break but it's not going to work out, so I am very sad to not see all you Utahns, especially sad because Emily is 8 months pregnant and happily, Denene is pregnant too! But a trip in June is hopefully in the works, then I would get to meet Emily and Travis' little girl and possibly be there for Ashley Hawkins wedding too!

I went and saw Makelle last week-she and Scott named their little girl Ruby Ann Marsee which I think is so cute. We had a nice time over there visiting and it was fun meeting little Ruby, even though I always forget how tiny newborns are! Rick had a good time entertaining little Savannah who is about a year and a half old. Only a month til Amber has her twin boys-kash and Jaxson! I can't wait to meet them!

All is well here though-just very busy with school of course. I'm looking forward to spring in the full fledged way. We've had some 60 degree days and I am happily taking those-although I'm slightly more interested in 70 degrees. Hopefully sooner than later!

Ok well I have a few pictures so I'll get them up!

Amber's Shower! I had to steal these pictures from someone else since I forgot my camera!

My Mom knit these tiny twinner sweaters for the boys. They turned out so cute and Amber loved them!

Amber's friend Becky hand stamped these cute little 2 peas in a pod onesies

Me smelling candy filled diapers for shower games

Amber's cute cake!

I'm throwing Jen's shower in May-it will be the first one I've ever done. Crazy!

At the end of February my friend Stephine asked me if I would come take some pictures of her with her siblings and her daughter for her Mom's birthday. People! I take pictures of houses not people, remember?! That's ok, I am always happy to do a favor for a good friend and Steph was really happy with the outcome so I was glad.

Here are Anna and I at the park during the "shoot"

THIS is why I don't have children. I was so lucky to catch the most perfectly typical Anna moment. Hilarious!

Thought I'd throw in a nice picture of Portland that I took for work earlier this month.

I had to go to OMSI for my meteorology class so I asked my parents to come along last Saturday. We had a fun time together and they have a great Chinese dinosaur exhibit there now. If you are even sort of interested in dinosaurs you should go see it, it really was awesome and so interesting!

Ancient Chinese fossilized turtles

The Chinese cousin of T-Rex

This picture cracks me up every time. It's not often you get my dad to cheese it up! Here were are as some flashy dinosaurs!

We got new cameras for work so I was testing it out on my lovely spring flowers. The stupid squirrels will not keep their nuts out of my pots though. Stupid!!!

Liz's 26th birthday was last week so we went out after work Monday night. Me, Rachel and Liz-we used to all work at Ridge together. Fun fun!

Well that's it for now. Back to the books. I don't have much planned this weekend. New brakes for the car and a giant paper to write.

Happy march!

Lauren

Ok I'm going to get the rest of my pictures on here and get caught up!
My old friend Alison, who I've known since 2nd grade came into town from Las Vegas over Christmas Break, with her new baby Olivia. Olivia was only 2 months old when we got to meet her. It's so hard having friends be so far away when they're expanding their families! We miss out on all these cute babies!!



Proud Mama Alison and little Olivia


I never would have thought Alison would have a dark haired child!


My wonderful old friends, Jen (pregnant), Alison and Olivia, Becky and Lucy and me sans baby


Jen, 20 weeks pregnant with baby girl Hall


Not a good pic, but here's Olivia with her Aunty Lauren
New Years Eve I met back up with the Ricker couples, or the Dobles as their known for lunch at Red Robin in Gresham.

For New Years I went with Rick to a party at some of his friends' house. I was pretty bored until randomly my old neighbor/friend showed up! Heather Butler's husband is friends with lots of Rick's friends. It's always one degree of separation in Portland.


I've known Heather since I was 3!


Rick & I at the party.
Not much happened in January.

 
Here's Amber and I in a maternity shop. They had fake bellies to show you what you'd look like 8 mos. pregnant. Amber, of course, is really pregnant.
I had a Pampered Chef party and that was fun, here's a few pics from that


Our friend Steph's little girl, Anna and a very traumatized Lucy


Jen, 23 weeks


Poor Amber, still has til beginning of April!


Makelle, at this point, with 6 weeks left, and Merrilee, about 4 months pregnant



Stephine and Becky


Amers & me


My old roomies


Becky and little Lucy
Last Friday night I went to a Dimes show


me, Brianne, Faith and Faith's boyfriend nate in the back


A better one of us girls
Well that's it for now! Hasta Luego!